In this thirty-eighth installment of the ongoing live series with Wendy Nash inquiring into meditation practice on and off the cushion we to delve into the influence of language in meditation. Recently a podcast guest mentioned a turning point when a teacher described the breath as: oh so delicate. There’s also an exercise some insight teachers do of getting into a meditative state and then reading off a list of words that are quite emotionally charged both positive and negative and then noticing the effects when dropped into meditation. (We do something like this with various words related to acceptance.) And if we can notice how impactful this is in meditation, how does that translate off the cushion? Also, how can language hinder and how can it help liberate? All this and more
0:00 – Introduction and Weather Chat
1:38 – Topic Introduction: The Influence of Language in Meditation
2:58 – Onomatopoeia and How Words Sound in Different Languages
6:26 – Language and Thought in Meditation
8:30 – Auditory vs Visual Thinking and Word Choice in Instructions
10:57 – Precision in Meditation Language and Over-Reliance on Words
13:53 – Guided Exercise: Dropping Acceptance Words into Meditation
16:32 – Discussion on the Acceptance Words Exercise
21:10 – Radical Acceptance and Wisdom in Arising Thoughts
27:42 – Article on How Word Sounds Affect Us
35:27 – Language, Emotions, and Wise Speech
37:40 – Harsh vs Passive-Aggressive Language
41:18 – Gender Differences in Nasty Language
46:41 – The Power of Kind Words and Self-Talk
49:51 – Meditation Helping with Reactions and Regret
51:15 – Internal Self-Talk and Judgment
54:55 – Moral Shame, Self-Deprecation, and Humble Brags
59:20 – Wrapping Up: Kindness and Christmas Advice
1:00:21 – Goodbye
Ai summarizes it thus:
1. **The Power of Words in Meditation Instruction**
– Certain phrases from teachers can create breakthroughs (e.g., describing the breath as “oh so delicate”).
– Subtle differences in wording matter: “observe the breath” feels distancing and dualistic, while “notice the breath” feels more open and direct.
– Historical translations of Pali terms (e.g., “enlightenment”) carry outdated Victorian-era cultural baggage that can mislead modern practitioners.
2. **Language as Sensory and Bodily Experience**
– Words land differently depending on the person: Wendy is highly auditory; others are more visual or kinesthetic.
– Onomatopoeia and sound symbolism show how some words mimic real-world sounds or sensations and affect the body more vividly.
– Reference to a research article: certain words (especially vivid, concrete, or emotionally charged ones) are more “surprising,” grab attention, and stick in memory longer.
3. **Live Exercise: Dropping Acceptance-Related Words**
Josh guides a short meditation, rapidly reading a list of gentle acceptance-oriented words/phrases (e.g., allow, permit, embrace, soften, surrender, tenderness, “it is like this,” “this belongs”).
– Wendy notes varied reactions: “allow” feels effortless and empowering; “embrace” or “surrender” can feel forced or trigger personal associations (e.g., childhood memory of unwanted physical affection).
– Highlights how the same instruction lands uniquely for each person and can reveal resistance, memories, or personality traits.
4. **Language Off the Cushion: Daily Life and Relationships**
– Harsh, passive-aggressive, or veiled toxic speech can be more damaging than overtly angry words.
– Discussion of “wise speech” (right speech): avoiding harm, gossip, deception, and “acting with a twist.”
– Gender observations on meanness: women sometimes use subtle, relational aggression; men more direct/physical.
– The importance of honesty as the foundation; lying (even to oneself) removes safeguards.
– Self-talk mirrors external speech: judgmental inner dialogue spills into how we treat others.
5. **Meditation as a Safe Space**
– The cushion amplifies sensitivity to language and emotion, making it easier to notice habitual patterns, reactivity, and inner narratives.
– Meditation creates space for response rather than reaction, revealing unconscious motivations and reducing self-inflicted drama.
– Keeping precepts (especially wise speech) reduces mental “gunk” that arises during sits.
6. **Closing Reflections**
– Shame can be healthy when it signals ethical awareness rather than self-beating.
– Humble-bragging and false humility are pitfalls; sincerity and kindness are the goal.
– Final holiday advice: be kind, give yourself slack, avoid excess alcohol, and choose words that bring peace.
Overall, the conversation emphasizes that language is not neutral—it shapes perception, emotion, bodily sensation, relationships, and meditative depth. Mindful attention to words (in instructions, self-talk, and daily speech) can liberate, while careless or harmful language hinders both practice and life. The tone is warm, honest, and practical, blending personal stories, Buddhist insight, and linguistic research.
*There’s naturally an ongoing open call for meditation (related) questions for the (roughly) monthly “Meditation Q & A” either by the various social media means listed; integratingpresence[at]protonmail.com or just showing to type/ask live.*

Background
Regular, current and past visitors to Integrating Presence may recall the monthly series “Ask Us Anything” I did with Denny K Miu from August 2020 until January 2022 — partially including and continuing on with Lydia Grace as co-host for awhile until March 2022.
For a few months thereafter I did various Insight Timer live events exploring potential new directions and/or a continuation of the Ask Us Anything format while weaving in other related teachings to these events.
Then, after chats with meditation coach Wendy Nash, it became clear to start a new collaboration similar to “Ask Us Anything” simply and clearly called “Meditation Q & A” especially due to the original intent of the Ask Us Anything’s being “discussions about meditation and related topics.”

Audio: Language | “Meditation Q & A With Wendy Nash” #38
Past chats with Wendy:

Unedited transcript via YouTube:
Hey, wholeness. Welcome. This is Josh integrating presence and I’ve got Wendy Nash with me. Wendy, what’s going on?
I’m here on Gabby Gabby country in Queensland in Kabula and it’s heading
into the heat of summer. So, of course, I’m in the southern hemisphere and
Christmas is here and Queensland is really, really humid. So, it’s not that
hot. So, it’s about, you know, 20. A hot day for us is like 34, which is not that
hot by Sydney standards. 34 is kind of that’s fine. Um, but it’s so humid that
if it’s 34, it’s like unbearable. So, when it’s not like that today, it’s like
I’ve got a fan on, but it’s not too too bad. I have two fans on, but it’s not too too bad. So, yeah, I’m uh I’m I’m
happy. How about that? I’m in a happy space. That’s great. Yeah. And it’s winter time
here. When I got back from New Hampshire, it was super super cold. Like, okay. So, I’m sorry. We’re the
last country on earth that uses Fahrenheit. So, Celsius means very little to me. Fahrenheit will mean even
less to you. Uh those 8° Fahrenheit, which is way, you
know, way way colder that it would be sub or negative easily negative Celsius.
So, so yeah, and you could do a conversion. But here in mid Missouri, it’s it’s fairly mild for the winter
right now. It’s almost uh 50° Fahrenheit. So, not even close to
freezing right now. So, it’s it’s really balmy for winter here. Um but yeah, it’s
it’s okay. And uh here we are today to talk about language. Right. Let’s do a a rough abrupt transition here. And I’ll
just read this what I have written for it. In this 38th installment of the ongoing live series with Wendy Nash,
inquiring into meditation practice on and off the cushion, we plan to delve into the influence of language in
meditation. Recently, a podcast guest mentioned a turning point when a teacher described
the breath as oh so delicate. There’s also an exercise some insight
teachers do in the insight tradition of meditation um of getting into a
meditative state and then reading off a list of words that are quite emotionally charged both positive and negative and
then noticing the effects when dropped into meditation and if we uh can notice
how impactful this is in meditation how does this translate off the cushion into
our life also how can language hinder and how can it help liberate? All this and more when Wendy and I speak about
language itself. So, I’m going to sit back here for a second and I think uh where does um is
is there anywhere you want to start with with what I read, Wendy, or anything else? Well, I as I said just before we came on
air, uh I was interested in the conversation had an article yesterday which was really interesting.
Unfortunately, I can’t find it today. I did. Oh my goodness. But what it basically said is that words
uh you know we are all familiar with anamatapia with which is that words
sound like um like plop plop a plop. Yeah. So yeah. So you can hear
sort of murmur, the water murmurs, you know, and so a a lot of words have this
anomatopic sound, although not all because as you would know um the word in
English is dog in in um Danish it’s hund. So or in French it’s uh so that
they sound all very different but a lot of words are very ontopic and a lot of
words land differently in the body. So I asked somebody when I was um in France
what does English sound like and it’s and he said it sounds like you’re always angry at each other.
There’s a lot to be said about that I think. Yeah. And I think maybe we are often angry and it’s like we hear French you know and we
don’t understand French. It’s like, “Oh my goodness, they’re so beautiful and lovely and flowery and and then you go
actually when you hear them, they’re just like, you know, arguing. They’re the same as us.” You know, it’s in Danish, you know, you you sort of have
that there’s a Yeah. So, but the saying is if you can’t say anything nice, say it in French.
Well, Greg GT, Greg, somebody rather um says hi. And Nexus Ingenaria says, “Hi.”
So, very nice. Hello. Welcome. Hello back. Welcome. So, uh, we’re here,
uh, meditation, Buddhist meditation Q&A. So, our questions, um, are about that.
So, if you have any questions about how language affects the way that you meditate and your Buddhist meditation
um, and any other questions too, meditative related, if we don’t get to them now, it’s been potential for for other times.
Yeah. Yeah. So L uh Wendy was talking about I think you’re kind of pointing at maybe
the origins of language a little bit. I mean, take it all the way back, right? And these categorizations uh about these
I always say that, you know, it’s it’s amazing how we make these little mouth noises and we can understand each other
or it seems like we can understand each other, right? And like you’re saying the anamanopia well just had to
conceptualize because there’s no video recorders of social media back then, right? We have to kind of do some guesswork about origins of language.
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