Podcast | Negligence and Misdeeds for Sagacity

This October 10th, 2022 Insight Timer live event addressed verse 50 of the Dhammapada as wisdom for potential clearing, activation and advancement:

Not the perversities of others, not their sins of commission or omission, but his own misdeeds and negligences should a sage take notice of


Thanks to Ellen for the great comments prompting some spontaneous teachings of sorts. I initially recommend a related podcast called “Ghosted, Ignored, Canceled?”:

Some of the (other) topics touched on include:

  • he said / she said
  • getting upset
  • mistreatment
  • clinging
  • (perceived) expectations
  • what others think
  • dismissal
  • self-responsibility
  • connection
  • society
  • challenge
  • righteousness
  • control
  • change
  • imposing
  • advice
  • frustration
  • care
  • allowing others to live their lives
  • emotion charge
  • absorbing into other
  • pulling back
  • self-monitoring
  • energy
  • entanglement
  • expansion
  • healing
  • memory
  • behavior
  • self-pity
  • self-hatred
  • what’s needed now
  • comfort zone
  • existence and nonexistence
  • love
  • wisdom
  • neglect and abuse
  • desperation
  • giving one’s heart away
  • innocence
  • belonging
  • worry as fantasy
  • letting go of friends and making new friends
  • feeling alone
  • escape
  • interconnection
  • being in relationship to everything
  • pain
  • (experimentally) intending to be rejected
  • indifference
  • putting oneself in another’s shoes
  • empathy
  • victimization
  • aspiring to sagehood even if not practical
  • seeing fruits of skillfulness
  • review and hindsight of meditation practice
  • negligence in meditation
  • amplification
  • vulnerability
  • opening the heart

Audio: Negligence and Misdeeds for Sagacity

The raw unedited YouTube transcription of this podcast:

Deeds for sagacity

potential clearing activation and

advancement from verse 50 of the dhamma

Pata which reads not the perversities of

others nor their sins of commission or

Omission but his own misdeeds and

negligences should a sage take notice of

so then reflecting on this for a little

while now it came in a Buddhist

newsletter and not quite this

translation I found this translation

really fond of not so much about sins

but you know we can just interpret that

how we want

and just to understand the words here we

all pretty clear on perverse

perversities of others things we just

kind of find fault of and the first part

we’re looking at others right so they’re

sins of a commission or a mission we

know what commission means in terms of

money right you sell something you get

Commission on it people will work on

commission if they have their goods or

services in a physical space so they

might get Commission on what they sell

there in this context I feel it means

like what is someone else either doing

for you or what are they allowing you to

do what kind of commission were they

giving you what’s in it for me kind of

thing a mission is pretty much the

opposite if you’re admitting something

you’re leaving it out so what are others

neglecting me on or leaving me out on

giving me the short stick on short

shrift but so then this this next one so

not paying attention to those so much

but one’s own misdeeds and negligences

should a stage take notice of so

misdeeds and I’ll go into this how this

could be misinterpreted too what one has

done maybe that one wouldn’t have liked

it done negligences of what have we

neglected first off a disclaimer you

know this is just kind of my own

interpretation of this my own

experiences with this what I can share

this is not to be taken as gospel

obviously so things to consider on your

own reflection on this and of course put

down what’s not helpful and take up

what’s helpful the first one this comes

in all the time I think where okay so he

said this she said this

she didn’t say this she didn’t do this

he didn’t do this this that or the other

so this is the kind of thing that we all

encounter in our daily lives and a lot

of times we’re about to speak for myself

here a lot of times I’ll um I will get

upset because someone has either

included me in something has cut me out

of something said something to me didn’t

say something to me this ties into my

preferences of how people treat me how

people should treat me you know in

expectations which

how much am I clinging to those

expectations and preferences right this

goes into this classic saying that’s

helped me so much for a time I was just

so overly concerned what people thought

and said about me really concerned about

that when I heard that what other people

think about me is none of my business it

was like this huge relief yeah you know

it’s that’s their business what they

think about me not mine now there’s a

the the the polarity of this can be

where I can just use that to write off

my own behavior right I could say oh

it’s no big deal you know people are

gonna think what they’re gonna think

I’ll just do whatever I want that’s be

careful for me to fall into the same

trap of that kind of not giving heed to

how Society runs and functions and it’s

a kind of a danger for me now because I

feel like oh yeah well I mean I can just

kind of get out of it or or you know who

cares societies like so messed up this

kind of righteousness holier than thou I

can fall into that trap still now too

this is an aspiration of mine too is

talking to people not about people way

easier said than done so we all see the

benefit of actually connecting and

talking to someone that we instead of

just talking about them behind their

back I mean how often do I do that right

people here can probably relate too I

don’t consider so much oh hey so and so

like a mutual friend you know what what

are they up to how are they doing and

then maybe some news comes up and

ideally though if there’s an issue with

someone or a challenge with someone will

speak directly to them I know it’s not

always the case and sometimes things and

situations can get really sticky and

then there’s a really good like mutual

friend both parties that can act maybe

as a mediator although that’s an

interesting role in and of itself too as

others saying of that place into I feel

kind of more updated on this is I can’t

control other people if they want to

change they have to want to change

themselves if I’m constantly spending

all my time and energy on the sins of

commission or mission of others or

noticing perversities in others that I

don’t like and that I feel I can have

some kind of intervention in or

something like that and maybe sometimes

there can be however for the most part

and especially it shouldn’t come from a

thing of control like this power Dynamic

of me wanting to control other people

because it’s impossible it’s a kind of a

Fool’s game now if people come to us for

advice and help that’s another story but

to impose my will and my judgments and

values on someone else trying to control

them for whatever reasons it’s kind of a

fruitless effort can also be frustrating

too I mean the frustration can still be

there for me and a lot of times it comes

out of being care too we want to have

the best for this person right so this

is where Equanimity I feel can come into

realizing oh hey they have to live their

own life make their own decisions even

though I care deeply about them I can’t

be there making all their choices for

them either and sometimes it’s just you

know heartbreaking to see someone you

love and care about just do crappy

things when I look at this too it’s like

where is the emotional charge and pull

to this why do some people in our lives

have such an emotional charge and pull

over us and especially at certain times

right what is that all about while other

people are just totally indifferent

towards so this emotional charge is in

this pull towards certain people this I

think will really draw us into their

world I know at least for me when that

emotional pull and charge is there it’s

just like I’m getting sucked into their

world and I totally kind of forget that

oh hey what’s the point of that

how much of a waste of time is that

sometimes it’s just getting out of that

complete absorption into someone else

basically pulling back this is a phrase

that the Shifu at Mid-American Buddhist

Association says a lot or at least did

when I was studying under him pull back

pull back and the mind and emotions will

go out to something but bringing them

back so that’s the first step for me is

just kind of realizing oh yeah hey uh

how am I viewing this how am I seeing

this what are the thoughts what are the

feelings where the emotions what needs a

response to this how am I going to deal

with this it’s like self-checking again

what we pay attention to amplifies what

we pay attention to right and a lot of

times it gets entangled so where

attention goes energy flows realizing

that okay the more I pay attention to

one’s sins of commission or Mission or

the perversity of others it’s actually

making them stronger and giving them

energy and becoming more entangled so

this is where the wisdom comes in for me

of okay well what about me what about my

misdeeds not just their misdeeds what

about mine what am I neglecting here on

myself so early on I had this this

expansive period when I was first in

healing when I actually was

acknowledging Misty

by myself and others too but mostly for

myself it was just kind of like really

sobering of all the things that I have

forgotten what I did and how I was

behaving I just really couldn’t see it

until I really started meditating it had

gotten that far out of hand right and

now with a lot of that stuff healed and

brought up to see and then committed to

behaving better and whatnot what this

can do though is it can go to the

opposite extreme where it can turn into

self-pity right oh I did I’m so such a

bad person right I did all this stuff to

them and there was that time where I was

just kind of stuck in that self-pity of

oh my God this is so horrible you know I

I’m such a bad person I can’t believe

I’d been in the mic and spit out

everybody hates me I don’t deserve this

you know what am I going to do this kind

of thing the other thing you can do is

turn into a dismissal though kind of

just glossing over this now where I’m

saying oh yeah I shouldn’t pay attention

to others okay I got it yeah I shouldn’t

pay attention to what other people are

doing the perversities their commissions

and missions what they’re doing what

they’re not yeah I don’t need to look at

that so it’s almost like glossing over

it so I think that’s the imbalance that

can be taken out of that too no abuse is

abuse right that needs to be

acknowledged and seen and acted on too

right we just can’t say oh I shouldn’t

pay attention to that but that’s not

what this verse means it could be taken

to that extreme too what am I neglecting

here when I look at myself a lot of

times it’s this question that we all

know of right what’s needed now so it’s

a beautiful question to ask that brings

things home maybe if I’m being honest

right now I just need a little bit more

sleep here in the short term not

something I really want to admit but

maybe that’s needed right now maybe

someone is so dead inside that they just

need to do something silly like not

necessarily literally here take your

clothes clothes off and run through the

woods naked or maybe someone is so burnt

out on plant medicine they’ve been doing

so much plant medicine that they need to

like I don’t know sit in a room for

hours this is kind of silly extreme

pondering the question what if existence

and non-existence didn’t even apply what

would that be like while things like

this also what’s being neglected am I

neglecting more love aspect or a more

wisdom aspect a lot of times you get too

into these kind of hard qualities where

it’s just kind of letting the emotions

take over or getting so deeply involved

and connected and absorbed and merged

into something that hey maybe a little

bit of wisdom is needed here because

it’s completely lost right or the

opposite where it’s getting really cold

and rigid sharp with wisdom and there’s

just no heart anymore there’s no heart

quality so bringing these Notions of

like compassion loving kindness

rejoicing and Equanimity and whatever

other beautiful heart qualities are

needed this also neglecting is like a

core wound so this is one of our core

wounds this is I see this that folks

that are neglected they’ll do anything

to including abuse so a lot of times

abuse will feel better than being

neglected they’ll go back to the same

type of abuse over and over again

because that’s what really gives that

emotional charge that hit kind of makes

a feel alive maybe like an addiction or

something it’s better than being

neglected that’s more on an external if

I look internally like what’s being

neglected and this is where the again

this question of what’s needed now

what’s being neglected these kind of

dark areas of ourselves that need love

and care too but sometimes obviously

we’re either in denial or we don’t want

to look at them for a long time it was

like well my desperation needs love and

attention to this wild quality that

repels people of oh I want to give my

heart away so quick and that it scares

people off right those parts need love

and attention too and our innocence I

feel as well for me for a long time

confusing innocence with stupidity and

low Consciousness but no it’s not the

same thing you wouldn’t expect like a

third grader to know calculus Ellen says

I’ve struggled with worrying about what

other people think my whole life we have

a human need for connection so that

connection feels threatened in a way

when I feel dismissed rejected unheard

yes Ellen I did a a live on this about

ghosting cancel culture and things like

this some people found that helpful and

this is really really common maybe not

everybody’s ready to hear this but I

learned this from a teaching that worry

is the worst kind of fantasy we could be

fantasizing about all kinds of lovely

beautiful things but what we’re worrying

about actually hasn’t happened yet it

doesn’t mean we don’t care and we can’t

prepare but actually worrying about

something is is a fantasy of something

that hasn’t happened and so when we get

to that point at least when I did it was

like a relief to realize that now the

human need for connection yes think of

what I think about all the friends that

I actually lost when I started to wake

up a little bit and give a crap it was

heartbreaking to lose those people that

I spent so much time in energy investing

in and at the same time you know maybe

it’s cliche to say that when one door

closes another one opens but that’s the

way it does sometimes it takes longer

for it to open than other times but it’s

almost like for people in my life that I

really even more value now I had to kind

of let go of the of the old friends that

we kind of outgo each other we just kind

of went separate ways our past diverged

so our interests weren’t the same the

connections weren’t the same but when

those were kind of let go of and grieved

it opened up space for others it’s

easier to say than actually going

through it now that connection feels

threatened in a way when dismissed yes

this connection it is a sense of

belonging is so very important I know

with deep meditation practice for me

it’s like when people say do you ever

feel alone I wish it maybe it sounds

wild but it’s like I wish that I could

like Escape people in environments for a

while but it’s not like that today I was

in a rural area my focus place and even

going into the woods there was these

Blue Jays and they were just

and then there was crows right and

there’s bugs and this is maybe not what

we think of a human connection but it’s

like impossible we can’t live in a

vacuum we’re connected to everything all

the time in a way a lot of times we’re

not aware of it but even our own minds

and feelings right there’s really people

can numb them out for a little bit but

they’re always back the body we’re

always connected to the body our

relationships to everything how we’re

relating to things that’s our connection

too so for me it’s impossible really to

not to disconnect there’s ways in

meditation to disengage temporarily but

we’re always kind of like aware of

something that awareness is

interconnected in a ways that brings me

great comfort a lot of times in in other

ways it’s just like okay well this is

can be really intense sometimes how do I

hold this well thanks Ellen she says

you’re so write your words are helpful

thank you but it doesn’t make the pain

really at least for a while it being

dismissed rejected unheard it can be

really really painful what I did as a

little practice for a while is actually

go out with the in the reverse intent to

be rejected to be dismissed to be

unheard instead of dreading that fearing

that actually making that the goal in

practice with that and see what that

feels like also I realize that

indifference isn’t really necessarily

rejection or dismissal and hurt so many

people have so much stuff going on

they’re so mired in pain that when I met

with indifference if I don’t aware of

that sometimes or I don’t even know

what’s going on with them obviously a

lot of times you know we can feel into a

degree with what’s going on just because

they’re indifferent doesn’t mean they’re

they’re hostile or don’t care or I’m

sometimes it might be but realizing that

until I myself in their shoes I really

don’t it doesn’t really dismiss their

behavior or say it’s right obviously

this question of well what have they

really gone through in their lives that

are making them behave this way towards

me right now it turns more empathetic

into like instead of me taking it as

being victimized what the hell have they

been through that they’re acting like

this treating me like this not in a cult

total shock or disbelief okay yeah

where’s the Common Ground here what can

I see or notice about this it sounds

easy for me to say this when I’m in a

quiet reflective space right but the

real challenge comes in our everyday

life like seeing okay well how well can

I see that and view that and what’s the

repercussions of seeing that and really

letting it sink in and when I don’t or

however the strategies that we use back

to this verse here this can actually be

applied in meditation really well too

our own Misty needs and negligences

should a sage take notice of well I mean

we can expire to be a sage right I mean

that’s a great aspiration I feel for

just about anybody even if realistically

never get there it’s still a admirable

thing or we can see these qualities in

others too again the not so much

misdeeds in meditation maybe in

reflection and contemplation we can

reflect on and the opposite too okay

well when I acted unskillfully and

unwisely well then a lot of times we can

see how those have unwise unskillful

results and then the opposite oh I I

said this someone said this to me this

happened to me I did this I saw it this

way instead of this way and now that I

can see the benefits of that so this

kind of Reflections it also this is kind

of go to evaluation after meditation too

it’s like okay well what worked and what

didn’t this is something I am I lack on

a lot too is that actually just going

back and reviewing not only each

individual meditation session but

progressing over time A lot of times it

happens very gradually it’s hard for me

to notice without review of you know

what are really the kind of turning

points it just kind of builds momentum

but when I look way back I can obviously

see tons and tons of benefits and

progression now the negligences for this

just means in meditation for me you have

a meditation object when am I neglecting

coming back to the meditation object

very simple right this this feedback oh

the minds wandered oh now in an emotion

so back to the meditation object the

breath or whatever it might be that’s uh

and then how are we neglecting how we

return to it right are we beating ours

am I beating myself up it’s like oh bad

meditator can never do this right or

just being too LAX and saying oh you

know whatever I just need to space out

right now I don’t need to really stay

with the meditation object or be clear

on what the intent is or anything like

this so it can act as a feedback

mechanism we don’t have to always look

at neglect as something negative or I’m

really doing something wrong I look at

more as like what’s wise and skillful

here what really needs attention and

when when we give something attention we

amplify it right so where do you want to

put your power what do you want to

amplify what do you want to risk

entangling it because when we give our

energy and attention to something

there’s a risk of entanglement would we

rather entangle with Enlightenment

entangle with wisdom entangle with the

beautiful heart qualities beautiful

mental qualities risk that yes yeah I

want to risk that I want to amplify that

well with that guys thanks so much for

joining appreciate the comments and

questions and the vulnerability with

sharing that’s how we really deeply

connect and open our hearts to is being

vulnerable at the same time

being brave enough and wise enough to

know when there’s abuse involved to

let’s do whatever we can to get out of

that situation again that question

what’s needed now you know sometimes

it’s pulling back and doing more

self-care self love self nurturing other

times it’s like okay well I’m way in my

comfort zone here I need to actually do

something a little more wild or risk

something get out of my shell get out of

my comfort zone this constant balance so

later on guys much love much wisdom

English (auto-generated)

Published by josh dippold


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