Being Seen. Being Heard. Being In Silence, Eyes Closed.

On Sunday January 23 I did the above titled Insight Timer live event with this description:

What does it mean to really be seen? Really be heard? To be in silence with closed eyes? Which of these is crying out the most for more nourishment from you & from/for those in your life? Let’s take 15 minutes or so to bounce these around with perhaps some mindfulness of hearing & seeing meditation

An edited version for podcast:

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Or listen via Insight Timer (app or website)

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The raw unedited YouTube transcription of this podcast:

easiest way

[Music]

all of us welcome josh to bolt here from

integrating presence today’s talk if you

haven’t seen the description

being seen being heard being in silence

eyes closed is the title with the

description what does it mean to really

be seen really be heard to be in silence

with eyes closed which of these is

crying out for more nourishment from you

and from those in your life let’s take

15 minutes or so to bounce these around

with perhaps some mindfulness of hearing

and seeing meditation so being seen and

being heard being seen it’s very healing

but how do we need to be seen and how do

we want to be seen have you ever been

with someone you just feel really get

you can really see you understand you

there’s so many ways this can happen for

me it’s

when i can connect with someone deeply

and share something with them

for others it just might need to be

given one’s full attention

and this is how we really help heal

people and heal ourselves when we can

really be seen what about being heard

some people in order to be seen they

need to be heard although i can’t

provide that for you here because um do

this platform insight timer there is no

ability for me to hear or see you really

at least in the way we normally think of

in day-to-day lives right but to be

heard i know when i’m hearing someone if

i can just set aside all my agendas and

plans

and my need to fix and change

um offer advice and wisdom and just

be present with someone and just let

them be exactly how they are come

exactly how they are be exactly how they

are be exactly how they wish i know in

my experience i can be with someone

and sometimes i can maybe see a little

bit deeper into what’s going on with

them and i

am not buying into how they want to be

seen but i’m seeing them how they really

are and so when i’m not mindful

that i have to bring kindness and

compassion and even just saying i have

to right but when i’m not mindful if

there’s no kindness and compassion

equanimity there

then

sometimes seeing through this layer that

they’re they want to be seen as or maybe

people have projected onto them how they

should be and when i or anyone else is

seeing through that to to their more to

their true nature who they really are

then sometimes that can be frightening

for someone because they may be not

ready to see themselves that way

maybe they don’t want to be seen that

way in that particular context in that

moment so this is when kindness and

compassion comes really in when we’re

seeing through that veneer of someone

into more of their true nature so i

invite you to share how you would like

to be seen

how you help others be seen how you’d

like to be heard how you would like

others to hear you maybe what gets in

the way of this

i was driving through a rural area of

missouri today

when there wasn’t much traffic around

the interstate just gazing off into the

woods in the forest nearby and

just noticing and also of course when

we’re in nature just noticing the

absence of this kind of need to be seen

and heard

and then the absence of this demand on

our attention

to be engaged and see

and hear others right nature just kind

of is it it accepts us for who we are

there’s not a lot of immediate

psychological

complications involved with being around

nature

not a lot of immediate emotional charge

there given there’s no predators around

then we feel a little bit safer to let

our guards down and just be more of who

we are on a deeper level also this this

other thing about being in silence eyes

closed you know what is it like to just

disengage unplug

from from this you know nature can help

us do that a little bit we can also do

that in the comfort of our own homes and

meditation it gives us a chance to

recharge and know what it’s like to

maybe see ourselves here ourselves

internally

why don’t we now

do some mindfulness

of seeing

and hearing perhaps

and so this goes what i’ve talked about

up to this point has been more

kind of

psychological

perceptions dealing with perceptions and

views

so mindfulness of seeing

is

cuts through all that

ideally

to the core of just the

function of our

senses right and so we just have an

eyeball

the physical eyes will deal with the

physical site and then

physical

objects

objects of sight so we have the eye

the objects

that site connects to and then we have

the contact between the two

and in that there’s eye consciousness so

we’re tuning into eye consciousness just

a simple

knowing of sight i think it’s

worth mentioning here there’s a

difference between looking

and seeing maybe as a visual metaphor

we have

a lake right

or

let’s say an ocean you’re out on the

ocean there’s no other visual reference

point really

unless whatever you’re on the craft it’s

just ocean in every direction as far as

the eye can see and horizon

unless we

consciously think to

zoom in to the waves

and start discerning and distinguishing

wave patterns and timing and maybe

different ripple formations and movement

and rising and falling

if we don’t look at that there’s just

seeing right

just the there’s not much distinguish

there’s not much difference in the

visual field like we’re in a in a room

like i am there’s all kinds of objects

and things like that

but we want to tune into is not looking

at a particular object because during

the day we’re mostly focused on

physical objects you know we see to be

able to move towards something or away

from something to get something or get

our gets put something away

so we’ll be just tuning in to the fact

that there is visual that we do have

sight vision

seeing happening

unless someone here happens to be blind

then i suggest just doing this for

hearing as well

invite you now to keep your eyes open

obviously and

um if it’s possible not look kind of

widen your visual gaze

out and

just notice that

seeing is happening

i mean it sounds so ridiculous right but

how much do we move through our

days chasing objects

using our going here and there

looking at things darting our eyes

around and not even really realizing

that

we have this

capacity called seeing

that seeing is happening

and of course for a reference point for

this we can close our eyes real briefly

notice how that’s different from

when the eyelids are open

now to spend a few moments here in

silence

and we’ll focus on just knowing

this beautiful gift of sight

no particular objects

if it helps to become more grounded and

immediate perhaps we can imagine

ourselves breathing in and out of the

physical eyeballs

you can notice

what objects

tend to grab our attention in the visual

field

that’s natural

can notice that

and return our intention and attention

to mindfulness of seeing not looking

just knowing

that vision eyesight

seeing is happening

and we might think well what’s the

connection

of mindfulness of seeing to being seen

well

if i had to guess on that answer i would

say

that there there’s really unless you

talk about mind consciousness

this eye consciousness that we’re

participating in here

knowing

seeing happening

that’s kind of like the underlying layer

of all of our visual interactions

for looking at someone if someone’s

looking at us

eye consciousness the eyeball

the object

and then the knowing

the contact of those two and the knowing

a lot of times we’re not even aware of

that

okay so real briefly here

let’s switch to mindfulness of hearing

now this becomes really obvious that

when we close our eyes

can especially if there’s sounds around

so we know we have an ear and all the

ear apparatuses

going on a physical ear

and then

the object that we’re hearing the sound

and then the knowing of the sound so we

can tune into what sounds we have in the

room right now once i stop talking

or wherever you’re at

so for me i can

hear very faint muffled sounds of the

neighbors

hear my computer fan kicking on because

of the video

of course you all can hear my voice

so those are the objects of sound now

can we be aware

that we can have this function

this functions capacity of just hearing

so we can

tune out

the details are

specific

discernment of what we’re hearing

or what it’s like

or when i don’t want to hear what i do

want to hear

and just focus on

hearing is happening

actually

that’s hearing now what this is about is

listening right

actually uh i take that back again

listening is something specific

hearing is the overall general quality

of my band

so notice that

this sense of hearing

knowing it

not what we’re hearing

but the fact that we are hearing

maybe think of it as hearing hearing

or listening to hearing

if you notice

now going away from that back to the

objects how near and far they might be

their intensity level

and then we can

return to knowing hearing

and another part of this is silence as

well

so listening to silence

noticing any

kind of feelings or emotions or thoughts

that might come up around

hearing or association with it

can drop those and we’ll wrap this up

a little bit

coming back to listening to silence

or knowing

that there’s this capacity

ability

sense called hearing

hearing is like this

not what we’re hearing

but just hearing itself

okay

and again

[Music]

i guess i can we’re over here

so we can dress really briefly

sitting in silence

eyes closed so

i guess we can just wrap it up with just

a few moments

of silence

okay

i wish you all

ideal and optimal

ways means and methods to

see others and to be seen

to hear others and be heard

and

the optimal

ideal meditation

in silence eyes closed

thank you guys for being here