On December 16, 2023 Denise and I spoke much about the subconscious healing technique with various real life examples from her work; impact of childhood experiences; identifying archetypes, emotional patterning, beliefs, storylines; NLP; change; negativity bias; emotional scale; trauma; “I am” and “I can” statements; therapy; worthiness; the importance of enjoyment in starting a regular, consistent meditation practice; and plenty more
Denise Miceli is an inspiring empathic guide, coach, and mentor in creating space for change and positive growth. She is known for her talent in energy healing, intuitive hot-seat coaching, and teaching new ways of accessing authenticity. Denise feels called to share her strategies and methods of self-awareness through subconscious healing, meditation, breathwork, and body-mind release, for continual self-reflection and growth. Her lifelong love of learning and sharing knowledge in manageable bites allows learning to occur naturally. She holds a supportive container for those ready to heal and allow their soul the freedom to awaken their infinite potential.
After enduring a difficult dark night journey, Denise cleared traumatic memories and emotional patterns that blocked her authentic self using subconscious healing. She has since been inspired to share this excellent healing modality. Denise transformed her health coaching business into Rock Your Blocks intuitive life coaching in 2023 after 25 years of teaching and guiding individuals and groups in improvement, health, and wellness. She holds degrees in Mental Health, Leadership and is a certified MAP Practitioner and health coach.
She now joyfully creates and publishes articles, audio, video, and healing collectives to share, inspire, and engage others in healing, personal growth, spirituality, and creating the life of their dreams. She is a compassionate, empathic soul that has a finely tuned intuitive sense that embodies the work of helping others connect with their soul’s purpose.
- Rock Your Blocks Website
- Medium
- Inspiring Guidance YouTube Channel
- Insight Timer Audio Meditations by Denise Miceli
- Rock Your Blocks Google Maps Business Page
- Rock Your Blocks TikTok
Audio: Subconscious Healing With Denise Miceli
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The raw unedited YouTube transcription of this podcast:
holess welcome this is Josh dippold of integrating presence and today I have
Denise Meli with me how’s it going Denise doing well thank you for having
me here Josh that’s my pleasure you’re welcome
um so the typical format and this is no exception since Denise and I don’t
really know each other and to keep me from reading a bio from a script I’m going to pass it back
and asked who is Denise and what does she
do so I am a a teacher at heart a guide
and I have been doing work uh in life coaching and I found that I have a very
strong intuition so I I do like to you know say that I’m an intuitive life
coach because I think that does add another dimension to it I was working in
the health and fitness uh field because there were so many people who had seen a
journey that I had taken that it just started organically happening and people were saying what are you doing what are
you doing why you make it look easy all of that so that’s where it all started but then um just before the pandemic I
began to start to see people really struggling making changes and so I started looking deeper
into how I could you know get more experience with the resistance that
comes up in in people when they try to change and that’s how I found uh sub the
subconscious healing and how I learned about the subconscious mind and the power of it especially when we go
through changes in life to kind of almost just keep reverting back to the
old stuck patterns that we have and so I’ve now kind of made that the focus of
my work and sometimes people do come to me wanting a goal in fitness health or
just aging well and uh and so I can weave together my knowledge about health
and fitness along with like okay what is the emotional pattern or the you know
the stuckness that you’re feeling whenever you try to implement these new things so it’s really a combination of
coaching teaching guiding but really tapping
into what are those patterns that are seem to be on repeat and so I got
certified in subconscious healing where I learned really how the brain works
works and how it’s so easily changeable you know if we go back in history about
how the brain was looked at I mean they they used to do some pretty extreme things to try to get people who had
problems you know what they would call mental problems at the time and uh now
from everything that we know our brains are neuroplastic and so if we simply
change the way that we look at things change the way we speak change the way we think and get out of the stuck
patterns we can create what we want in life so that kind of gives you a little
bit of an overview and I was an educator for years um and
ironically or not uh the goal of all of my work was helping people change
helping people kind of face difficulties whether it was in their role or you know
helping others is you know getting stuck in that and finding like I’m doing the
same thing but I want like my students to learn and they’re not well maybe the students in front of you have changed
and you’re still doing the same technique and so it really has been a lifelong journey for me of personal
growth and also helping other people people through change so I think I developed a resiliency at a very young
age and a positive attitude no matter what’s going on there’s a reason for it
and even as a uh a pre-teen I was I had found meditation which is pretty uncommon but
I was struggling and I was looking for answers and I found yoga and that got me
into meditation I remember finding the book Transcendental Meditation
you know in the bookstore the local bookstore and it literally changed my
life and you know throughout life you go in and out of it so I’m not going to say I meditated all those decades but it it
did always come to me as a tool when I struggled so part of what I Infuse into
the work I do is I try to help people understand the reason why this concept of mindfulness self-awareness there’s so
many terms for it now the reason why it keeps coming up espe especially now as we’re going through you know the whole
globe is going through massive change is that it really does work so part of what
I like to teach people and guide people is to find and curate their own
practice so that whatever work they do whether it’s doing you know a subconscious healing guided coaching or
they find another way what keeps you moving forward to change and to grow is
to have a practice you can’t rely on people outside of yourself right you can be guided and learn from teachers but
you know who wants to work with somebody all the time you want to integrate those skills into yourself so part of what I
do is help people find the best practice for them develop consistency in it and
learn that you know that changes too with time and there’s nothing wrong with that you know sometimes people will say
to me I tried medit ating and it it just didn’t work for me and I’ll ask them about you know give me some details and
they did it once or twice and I’m like it is a practice that’s why people call it mindfulness practice because practice
you know it’s not about perfection the minute you sit down and try to quiet your mind for the first week you could
have nothing but thoughts and that’s part of the process is to start to see
just how much you are affected and impacted by things outside of you so
well all right beautiful um there’s plenty uh tossed out there to work with
I want to dive in deeper to the subconscious healing technique as I’m not familiar with that um the but the
the other thing I think where we should start is um is with this notion of
change itself uh and then maybe if there’s time left over I’d like to to go into meditation practice and how you
help people you know establish a meditation practice because that’s my wheelhouse is meditation and um I’ve
just I just naturally stuck for me almost immediately which is a Rarity as far as I understand so let’s look at
this thing of change right so what are some of the things um that are involved
in change most likely you know um what what needs to be changed I mean usually
if people come to you they know what I I would just guess they probably know what needs to be changed or what they want to
be CH what they want to change and then so I think that the media thing that’s coming up what happens if something’s
just not realistic or maybe it’s going to take a really long time for them to
do right or maybe in your guidance that maybe they shouldn’t maybe they
shouldn’t go in the direction that they want with you you know these type of things and then the biggest thing is um
roadblocks I think for change too so I think that’s enough material to to get us going here yeah there’s there’s quite
a few different ways you could go but yeah I’ll talk a little bit about change because I think that some people are
very uncomfortable with change and others are pretty comfortable with it I
think that I became very comfortable with it at a very young age because of my family of origin so one of the things
that I ask people about is you know what was your life like from 0 to seven
because that has a massive impact on your subconscious mind and also how you
feel about yourself and even if you don’t have any
distinctive memories sometimes it’s just an emotion that comes up of like for
example unworthiness if you feel unworthy and you don’t really know why there’s something going on there that is
causing you to make decisions in your life that you’re not happy with so sometimes people come to me let’s you
know use that quick example of you know they want to just be healthier um I’ve had people say to me on the free call I
really want to work with you I’m excited about what you know about nutrition but I don’t want to change anything I’m
eating so right there we have a mindset issue I’m not going to go ahead and work
with you because you’re telling me you’re not going to change anything right so sometimes it is like you said
okay this probably isn’t a good fit because I’m about helping you to see and don’t have like a even in my my life
coaching that’s not about Wellness I don’t have a program but I have people connect with what it is they’re eating
and how they feel after so many times right just like in life we’re going so fast we don’t pay attention to the
effect of things on us and so um you know I explained to the gentleman I said
you know I totally hear you but unless you said to me you know what di I only
want to work with you on Fitness and you know we’ll just leave that’s fine I I’ll work with you on that but if you’re
telling me you want to you want to feel better but you’re eating the same exact thing for how many years and and also
you’ll find this with supplements right they’re taking the same supplements for 10 years I’m like your body probably stopped needing that like nine and a
half years ago right we never want to get dependent on one thing outside of ourselves we want to kind of get to the
root cause of things so I try to help people on that first call is to really find out is their goal something they
can work on in that example he he wasn’t willing to and I said I’m willing to work with you if you’re willing to look
at what you’re eating and see if it’s really helping you because what you’re telling me is what you’ve been doing
hasn’t got you to your goals do you just want someone to talk to about it every week because that’s what it you know in
the back of my mind my gut my intuition was telling me he just needs a friend you know which is fine but again if you
talk to someone about the same thing over and over and this is where a lot of times people will come to someone like me who has a subconscious or a different
way to heal emotional patterns because they’re tired of talking about it talking about something thinking about
something in a pattern that you have just creates more of it or just keeps
you stuck in that same thing and so that’s where and I can jump over into
the subconscious so its mindset right and if it’s a goal that you’re on one hand telling me I want this and I want
it now I’ve had people say that want to lose 50 pounds in8 weeks I’m probably not your gal I want to help you create
long-term change I’m not the one to call right before your weddings who can get into a dress like no you know and and
right away I can usually tell on a call when people set an unrealistic goal like that it’s um it’s not something you know
that like the minute you get into that dress like you’re done with the changes I’m really about lasting change so it’s
mindset really real istic you know goals for the situation and what people are
willing to do and commit to and um you know even even just tracking nutrition
you know if I’ve had people tell me oh I’m terrible with these apps and that because I’ll you know that’s one way I
do it with them I say give me 10 days worth of data tell me how you’re feeling and then I will tell you some different
macros that might make you feel differently and they’re not willing to track it so it’s that willingness to to
do a new activity even if it’s just for you know typically I don’t work with people for less than three months but
going into the new year I want to make it six because I know that three months we can make a change but it’s still not
long enough to create those Pathways in your brain that want to stay with it you
know you could lose half of the weight for example in three months but you have
still this subconscious part of you that can still revert back and say oh it’s
the holidays I’m throwing my hands up and I’m I’m just you know whatever
everything goes and it’s that kind of you know your body doesn’t like that kind of extremism right all of a sudden
January 1 comes and you’re going to be perfect so I look for you know are people willing to commit what is their
mindset and what is their goal and that usually tells me whether it’s a good fit
and um you know and also too like not that other people who do those short-term things aren’t you know
worthwhile but it’s just not my style and then with the subconscious healing
it really the the certification that I got is based on two different kind of
schools of thought in um psychology one is neurolinguistic programming which so
many people have you know written about the I am statements how powerful they are you know and I like to think of what
I hear more often than an I am statement is an I can’t statement right people say
oh I can’t do that I tried that plan or I can’t do that or I can’t eat meat or whatever it is and it’s like they’ve
closed off their mind so it’s another indicator of like the mindset but it’s based on NLP which is
really just being careful about how you talk to yourself because your subconscious is listening and it’s going
to give you again more of the same so if we can slow you down and that’s where
the mindfulness comes in if we can slow you down enough to stop that negativity
because the one thing about the subconscious is it is based on a lot of
the longterm emotional patterns behaviors thoughts repeated thinking
comes from a time when you were young you were so
impressionable and whatever happened during that time and and I tell people this I’ve had people who’ve had massive
trauma to people who just felt left out maybe they just didn’t feel a part of
their family they felt they were the youngest they never got seen it doesn’t have to be a massive thing it’s just an
emotional memory that you have and every time you go to do something new there’s
that sticky feeling again and so I call it a negativity bias because back then
we created these parts of ourselves to be seen to be heard you know if we were told you know don’t talk to me about
that we learn to be quiet about it we earn to keep parts of ourselves quieter and away from our caregivers or you know
we learned what they wanted and then we provided that and it was all out of just wanting that unconditional love so I it
combines what is known as ifs which is internal family systems so I do a little
bit of work in the beginning on what’s your family of origin story and I can’t tell you so many people especially you
know as we get older into the dec ades where we’ve got Decades of these patterns had some type of parenting
situation or family situation where they felt unseen they felt that they had to
push part of themselves down and you know it could manifest in later in life
you get into a career and you’re like wow this is great money and you know I’m recognized and that but I don’t love it
or you can get with a partner who maybe your family was really happy with but
now you’re like I don’t feel like I’m in sync with this person you know you can start to have
almost these feelings of impostor syndrome because you have learned so well this well-worn path in your brain
about doing things that you don’t necessarily enjoy doing uh saying yes
when you mean no all of those things and they can build up to a point where people will
come sometimes just very confused they’re like you know I should be happy
I’ve got this I’ve got you know a relationship I’ve got you know a great career but I’m not feeling fulfilled and
they’re very confused about why and so that’s where it’s like it really helps to work with someone on a longer term
but a lot of it ends up going back to they’ve really lost touch with who they
really are because they were so in that pattern of doing what was needed when
they were younger and they don’t realize it because we we’re not aware of those parts of us so through this work we
start to identify those younger Pro more protective parts that said you know what
it’s you really need to not ask for so much you need to make the other person
for example in relationships just see how valuable you are but meanwhile if you overdo that you become a people
pleaser especially common in women right but it can be anyone and and suddenly you’re like like but wait a
minute there are things that I enjoy and I like and that has been left out of the equation and we have to take
responsibility for it for sure but it does help to understand that it developed out of a need for
unconditional love and maybe just maybe you felt that your love was going to
come to you under certain conditions so it’s like we develop sort of an unhealthy relationship with ourselves
because we disconnect and then we might get in connection with people jobs situations
that that disconnected self was okay with but now here we are like you know
we’re coming back around into meditation or we’re you know having experiences in our life that make us question
everything and that’s when you know I say I call it sometimes the Dark Knight Journey which you can go through
multiple in your life where you say why am I doing this so that’s kind of a like you know
how the pieces of this I really feel this uh this subconscious healing by looking at the parts you know because of
course what if we have more than one part like there’s you know I like to use the archetypes when I have people look
at their family and say what would you say like were you a rescuer were you just the quiet artistic one were you um
you know the ring leader of your brothers and sisters like if you had siblings you know and then what do you
think your parents were you know and and just by looking at that that Dynamic you
start to realize wow I have literally been a rescuer my whole life and was
that really who I was or was that something that developed out of a need to survive that circumstance and then
because it became so strong those parts of us become so strong that they start to operate in our adult life and it’s
sometimes sometimes people never realize that and other times they might real realiz it over and over like you know a
marriage or a partnership or a career is suddenly you know they’re suddenly
feeling sad all the time and they’re like what’s going on here I I’m actually really good at this but it doesn’t feed
me it doesn’t make me feel happy to be good at it so I think that that’s where
people get to where it’s like you know what that resistance you’re feeling is a sign that you really have some inner
work to do and so that’s where I you know through this process of
subconscious healing it’s usually an hour to an hour and a half session because we take a little bit of time to
get mindful we share a little breath or a meditative practice to get people to
where they can slow their mind and then the the subconscious you can engage with
the subconscious you can have Insight you can have all kinds of things that come up just by talking so what I
learned is how to talk to the subconscious but I try to teach my clients how to talk to it as well
because you can actually use it for example if you have a racing thought you know anxious person rather than the
other side the the um you know depressed or sad you can use it to just say you know
what I want to get some more sleep you know the waking up in the middle of the night so please tag and treat these
racing thoughts because I really want you know and so there’s a a simple way that you can learn to be that in touch
with your inner self and then everything is up for grabs in your life and you can
start to feel more oh this does feel more like what I want to do you know you
can start to allow yourself to try different things to have a more of an
open mindset because a lot of times we’re so stuck in those patterns we don’t realize that we really closed off
from anything we’re not familiar with and then add to it the pandemic where everyone literally got locked up and
closed off from everything right even going out to work and now many people
struggle with like oh I can’t work at home I can’t just be cloistered in my little space you know so I feel like
people are still going through um you know the physical result of all of that
as well beautiful yes yes
um uh the thing that was coming up when you were talking about this is sometimes
seeing and knowing this is is that’s all it takes right but other times seeing
and knowing all this patterning uh is very helpful and that’s the that’s the it’s it’s a requirement obviously to do
that but are there more um practical steps to do this you know if somebody
doesn’t even know what really makes them happy too right and yeah like you said maybe they need an
exp exploration period um and there’s this whole notion yeah some things from
the outside will will allow that and Foster well-being and happiness um but
it’s at the end of the day I think the full it’s it’s kind of an inside job but what I wanted to ask is are there you
talked about uh tagging and I forgot the other term you use but are there other
practical steps that people can use once these uh patterns and archetypes are
identified and um seen in order to uh move through them um
yeah yeah so I I think you know one of the sort of uh strategies in the method
that I was taught was that you start with emotion and that Primary Emotion usually
has a lot of charge behind it and what happens when you work on that so like
typically a first session we would work on something like that what’s the emotion that seems to run through
different areas of your life you know um is it overthinking is it you know just a
high anxiety feeling or is it more prone to sadness and that bringing that down
through the the session allows people the space to have s such amazing
insights sometimes they can connect it to a body part because we do hold right
we do hold trauma or traumatic memories emotional pain uh losses right into
particular body parts I’ve had people in the middle of the session be like oh you
know something shifted in this area like a lot of women it tends to be either the heart or the throat like they’re they
have a hard time speaking what they need or they have had heartbreak right who hasn’t had heartbreak but it it’ll it’ll
start to shift that but it’ll move down into the hips and I tell people this
we’re always trying to move it down why because we really want to get rid of it we want to release it down into the
Earth we want to let it go but it will you know so sometimes I will just say all right let’s let’s get you down on a
mat and let’s do some restorative practice and a lot of times it’s you know we’ll open them up with the healing
and then it’s like all right there’s some releasing and so we’ll do like you know a restorative okay we’re going to
do a um a shavasana but face down because we’re going to just allow
everything to drain out of you so it’ll be you know more of a integrated somatic
kind of thing where I’ll work on doing those commands around what it is now
where did it move to and how can we release it down and through so that’s also part of it so you know I will
recommend to people especially if they haven’t been doing movement I’ll give them some specific things to
release like if you’re an overthinker and you have trouble even getting to sleep which was a condition for a while
when we didn’t know especially when we didn’t know and and today right there’s many things we don’t know of what’s going to happen is just putting your
legs up the wall and as a meditator yourself I’m sure you know about some of these things but you put your legs up the wall what happens all of the
stagnant energy that is pulled into your legs right a lot of us are sitting we’re
not active during the day and so all of that is allowed to drain down into through your hips and out and the the
people who had absolutely no interest in yoga or anything else I said I promise you could even do it on your bed as long
as you have access to put your legs up the wall and then just roll yourself down just five minutes and you will
sleep better and they were just amazed they like that’s it I’m going to be doing that forever so you know there’s
physical practices um um breath practices and I often will teach um you
know here’s a series of things you can do if you need to downregulate your nervous system and here’s some to
re-energize if you tend toward that more sadness you know and I and I like to you
know being I have I do have experience in mental health but I will tell people this there is a spectrum and it’s either
you tend towards sadness or you tend towards worry those are the two ends of the spectrum where are you on that I try
to get people to get really good at checking in with where they are and
understanding that whatever emotional state that you’re in now there’s always one level up that you can go you want to
avoid going down so this is another practical application is that checking in where are you on the emotional scale
and how can you think about a way to get yourself up from there and also realize
hey guess what I’m not at the bottom right I’m not not at total fear and you know overwhelm I’m somewhere in the
middle and you know what that Midway point is better than being at the bottom
so what can I do right now to get me out of that and just simple things like if you need to energize go outside in the
sunshine you know um I write articles about that as well how you know simple
things that we do we don’t realize that if we just change our routines a little bit we can give our body more of what it
needs because when we train you to um to be open to the subconscious and how it
can change the brain so quickly we also want you to have tools that you can practice daily that will you know for
example you know getting into the sunset getting into the sunrise the color of
light that you get at those times and what it does for your hormones you don’t need to take supplements for this stuff
but you have to be willing to listen to what your body body needs and be like wow it felt so great when I woke up and
I actually saw the sunrise there are physical reasons for that and once you
experience these things so I I’ll give people like the down regulating the uppr regulating types of things that they can
begin to do and you know journaling is a part of it some people don’t like to
journal I’ll tell them get a voice recorder out open on your phone start to reflect about what it is you’re doing
and how it’s impacting you so that you can be a little bit more will oh I can make that tiny little change you know I
can do those those things um during a session we’ll work on clearing something
that is feels heavy and we start with emotions we go to repeated thoughts and then of course
repeated thoughts are what become our beliefs about ourselves so we go into belief so each session as we go we start
to really build on it we do that family of origin archetypal Discovery um and then we talk
about storylines what are the stories that we’re telling about our lives if we
keep repeating the same story we stay in that story right
there’s no room for anything else so what story can we create and as the session each session comes to a close we
try to get the person to create an I am statement or an I can you know I do use
my intuition there to kind of tell what are they ready for you know is it an I
deserve statement because they’ve never allowed themselves to feel deserving um
and then we develop that together you know I give more assistance if they’re new to it um and sometimes they’ll just
be like oh here’s the statement and then we try to magnetize that with talking to
the subconscious and I tell them put it on your phone screen because we know you’re looking at that right put it
everywhere and make it be part of your daily practice
and see what else comes up see what resistance comes up to it what old stories might try to come in and that
way you can bring that to the next session but you can also start to see okay well I do believe this except you
know with this one person right typically people are not drowning in
that emotional pattern in every area of their life but there’s one person that
triggers them or something they hear on the news that triggers them and and I love to bring up triggering because this
did not even exist outside of like you know psychological assessments and things
like that five 10 years ago but now why is it so rampant that we’re all
triggered so much or you know many of us can get triggered by things and we find ourselves having you know internal
thoughts about it or we say something out loud and we’re like oo did I just say that that was pretty charged
and it’s because we it’s a sign of like needing to do inner work do I really
feel that way or is it just a knee-jerk reaction to hearing a political news story you know is it is it something
that I’m allowing to kind of keep me in a negative kind of thinking pattern so I
think that triggering is what I tell people is try to look at it as a positive sign that there’s some part of
you that’s not okay with this outward AC ity or this mental thing you know
process um or you know that kind of statement like oh I can’t believe
they’re saying this now or you know there’s that I can’t and we actually do have a whole series of on working on the
statements that we say you know the storylines that we tell and um really
trying to neutralize them like I tell people this it’s never about getting rid of or feeling bad about feeling
something or having you know a story that we’ve been telling for a long time but it’s how much do you want to move
forward let’s give that a little bit of calming energy so you can bring in
something more positive and if it’s maybe it’s just I want to be more calm and focused you know I want to do my
work from inspired action not feeling forced by deadlines you know which one
is is more productive and most people will say yeah I want to be inspired when I sit down to do my work I don’t want to
feel like I have to do it because that doesn’t bring up the most you know the best energy the best outcome
so very that was the last part is a really good point for me too because I can get kind of addicted sometimes of
ticking things off my list right but if I’m doing something important that’s going to be published out there that’s
not the right kind of energy to bring and I like this notion of triggering I I I say to folks well triggering is great
because then it just shows me what I haven’t addressed yet what I need to work on is yet you know um so yeah it
doesn’t have so much to say with what’s outside of me it’s how I’m viewing it how I’m responding to it and what’s my
relationship to that within myself as well so the other thing that that stuck
out for me here was this notion of um these these statements um that we’re you
you know these I am statements or the the the I can statements I like that I like that even more or the you know
and and so what I found with these is they need to like you say they need to be believable otherwise to me it just
seems like I’m lying to myself right I don’t do these as much anymore however
what I what I do I like to acknowledge the way it actually is now and not try to delude myself this is the way I’m
seeing it now and at the same time I set an aspiration this is where I would like to
be these are the qualities that I I aspire to and that I can work then what
are the acable actionable steps and new ways of seeing that are can be conducive
to aspiring towards these new values um this this new way of being this this new
way of seeing and and then also with is with with therapy I wanted to ask you um
in these type of things too um I’ve noticed yes dredging up this this old
material is so helpful uh for a while and then I wonder though
is if if it’s already been addressed and there’s been great progress made on it
does it does it make how much sense does it uh make to keep revisiting old
material uh and one part of me thinks that yeah you know after some progress has been made or I don’t know exactly
where to draw that line but how much of this can actually either reboot it I
think you were saying this earlier um or some something along these lines like um reinforce it and then if there’s trauma
involved how much of it can even ret traumatize and and how do you work with people about this um this that notion
that I find um at least the small stint I did with therapy that’s what I was
Finding after a certain point that I was feeling obliged and obligated to to keep
rehashing the same material just because I was in therapy you know so or doing
therapy exactly and and it feels very like to me it started to feel very indulgent and
also just I would leave feeling very sad and I just was like I’m not a sad
inclined person you know and so I just I said I don’t want to do this anymore and
I had done it throughout my life at various different stages so I had this unique way of looking at it that and and
also too if I add now the subconscious lens what I believe was happening in each decade or time period of my life
that I was doing it is I was having conscious realizations about things but
it was very limited to that situation so you know just briefly like when I first
got married I was very young and I I saw myself acting like my mother I was like
whoa whoa whoa whoa this is not who you are de and I you know was just lashing
out in an angry way instead of like talking about things and being very logical which was my way and I was like
this is this is nuts you know and so I went to specifically for therapy for like I need to deprogram the imagery of
my mother as a wife out of me you know and so that worked very well for that
and it led to me going okay um what you know now what is this relationship to me
if I’m not this sort of overprotective you know know um maybe more narcissistic
which I didn’t realize at the time that my mom was but you know so it just it’s
very specific in the conscious work and it is very drenched in that specific
time period or situation that brought you there whether it’s a relationship a job whatever and so I feel like it
doesn’t really touch the fact of that family of origin you know your role in
it and I didn’t think anything about what my role was in the family I just really focused on like now this new role
and how I was kind of mimicking what I had seen and what generationally you know not to just call one person out but
generationally had been the pattern in a very traditional Italian Greek um very
patriarchal expectation kind of a family and so when you have all of that going
on it’s way bigger than just your relation ship in your family it’s like
this is what is in the DNA and so um
working with the subconscious to me it it was very quick that I was able
to see the patterns throughout my life and that’s one of the things that we talk about is like you know identifying
the emotion the repeated thought the belief the story whatever it is but then we ask people to make that connection to
what other areas of your life so we can bring that in so we can treat all of it at once you know we do like something
called a structure of associations and in the beginning of doing this work there is a training for specifically
your brain it’s about 10 minutes 20 minutes there’s three versions 10 20 and 30 minutes where you just sit and listen
to it it’s got some visuals to it but it is all about Association dissociation
very like I said based on NLP where it’s it’s not really about you logically
understanding it it’s about activating those parts of your subconscious that understand it’s about putting together
all of those pieces so that you’re you’re tagging when I say tag and treat
is kind of one of the main commands is that find all of those things that are layered we even talk about emotion
collages because you know if you have a sadness thing or just a dissatisfied
mentality from your family of origin that’s probably not just one area of
your life but if you’re in talk therapy you’re talking about it in just this one way so by doing it this way we’re able
to layer in the healing and so um some of the people I work with with more
severe trauma and that have done this method have tried everything to erase
that childhood trauma it was you know serious abuse in some way like there was no trust they couldn’t rely that they
were going to be cared for whatever the case may be and um even though they got
some relief from the conscious talk therapy and some of them had even gone
to you know uh psychedelic therapy some had gone to EMDR and had some success
there it was always something where it was out of the box of talk therapy that
they were able to achieve more space in their like in their mind in their life to
experience it from a different way to really let go of having been victimized
in whatever way that um somatic work that it was always something deeper that
came in and the people who came in and had tried that and it didn’t work this was like oh my gosh you know it’s stuck
in my hips and so sometimes it would be you know we do something to release it they’d come back the next week and they’
need a little bit more work in it so with those folks I would give them you know some journaling to do in between I
would give you know we’d work together on creating those statements that they would work on and you know typically it
would take a little bit longer because you know especially if you’re up there in your fourth fifth sixth decade and
more you’ve got a lot of time in on those parts they have become very strong
so and they become very resistant to change so we can literally get into the
weeds with them and say younger part you know we’re respectfully asking
you and I love using metaphors in this you’ve been driving the bus you’ve been
jumping in whenever there’s any kind of fear and we want you to sit in the backseat we love you we thank you for
all this protection that you’ve given and we understand where it came from from but we’re the adult now and we
don’t need you to be so hypervigilant we just need you to understand that we’re going to make the
choices that are best for us now because really when you dig into that subconscious and I love this part and I
I started writing a book honestly from having great these great co-creative conversations on the podcast I started
outlining a book after the first one is to understand the subconscious mind is
so empowering because this is why meditation works this is why self-awareness practices work because
our our mind is changeable and the studies they’ve done
on this particular type of healing you can actually see in a qeg that the brain
is changing do they understand how no that’s still all you know but they can
see that just from talking to it and acknowledging these things that hold so
much negativity and so much weight can be shifted and moved they can they’ll
never be completely gone they’re part of our soul they’re part of who we are our hearts however you think of it but it
can be just calmed to the point where you know people can just not be viewing
themselves as a victim anymore you know be feeling like okay that got
demagnetized and then like I said earlier that you want that session to move into now now what is left what are
you feeling what are you thinking you would like to have more of in your life
we get them into sort of a mini magnetization to wrap it up and then
what um the research shows on this is that even after the session is over
there is a window where those commands are still active in you so I ask people if you can do do something chill get a
massage go take a bath take a Walkin nature bring your Journal like do
something for you because the hits will keep coming you know especially for
those that are going to do their daily practice and get subconscious healing in
combination and I do have clients that they’ll just come to the session and rely on me to create that it’s going to
take longer to create those changes so the most effective way is to help them develop a practice to keep them going on
it but use that time wisely like don’t book a session and then be like I’ve got six other appointments that day like
book it and then just chill and take care you know self-care and self-compassion are the two things that
we’ll talk about throughout the session like how are you doing that for yourself now and if they don’t have a lot of that
going on there’s usually a lot of negative selft talk right there’s there’s a lack of compassion there’s
that practice of you know like what leads to imposs Foster syndrome that constant self-doubt voice is has been
given more power and more strength you know and that’s where in a lot of the
sessions that I get to there is usually some form of people pleasing Behavior
trouble with communicating needs and or full-blown impostor you know like
someone has experienced great success and then they’re like oh but I can’t ask that much for what I’m offering you know
there’s all these different issues of like you know really feeling worthy of
what’s coming at them you know they’ve created space and things have gotten better but then they have like an an
attack of self-doubt and that’s there’s those parts that are going no are you
serious you think you can do that and that we don’t realize how much power they have and we just simply need to
bring them in and identify them and say you know we even call it the protector
controller you know there was if you had abuse or neglect very severe as a young
child there is a protector there and so when you go to be vulnerable in a relationship and you want to open your
heart to someone that protector could be sabotaging you and you could be pushing that person away without knowing that
that’s where it came from that protective [Music]
part wow great insights here uh I I love these flushing out these details of all
this inner work and you’ve you’ve touched on so many of the kind of motifs and challenges that we as a society seem
to to have in these days and I think you touched on a lot of the the feminine
challenges in particular as well um so before we start wrapping up here I just
wanted to ask if you have some quick tips and techniques for starting a daily
practice especially meditation uh and just how how you work
with folks uh maybe even in your own experience to do that if you have one too
yourself sure so I’d like to tell people this that that don’t be overly committed
to one type right you might Listen to Like An insight timer meditation to really resonate I know I’ll I’ll use my
example because I used to love in the beginning having a guided meditation
because it’s helpful for beginners right it gets you to go oh wow I’m really holding my shoulders really tight you
know doing little mini sort of like calming and soothing techniques and I’ve
learned so much about nervous system regulation so I tell people start where it’s comfortable now some people have an
attitude towards it that is very like oh it’s so woo woo and that I tell them you know what just listen to a sound then
maybe you love cello music for example just listen to a beautiful five minute cello piece like make it something that
brings you a good good emotional feeling and don’t worry about it fitting in a container right because a lot of people
picture someone in a robe you know uh with a mantra and they just can’t connect to it so if that is what’s
happening then ask yourself what is it that you enjoy what you know is it jazz
is it you know so I start with that and then if they’ve never experienced sound healing often those can be so powerful
for people that just you know it’s a simple soothing binaural be salegio
frequency and so I like to produce those I don’t produce the music myself but
I’ll just share like in my YouTube channel I do like mostly 10 15 minute
because I know that in a as a beginner that’s what they’re going to be able to sit for so I’ll you know offer those as
a as just a starting place you know and see whether you like the music The
Healing Beats singing bowls make it a fun exploration and and if one really
speaks to you then stick with that for a while but the whole goal of it is to let your mind go right and you know a lot of
what people will say is I sat there the whole time and just nothing but thoughts came through I would get that a lot when
I taught like um restorative yoga that’s okay you needed that you needed that time to just let it all roll through and
I’ll tell people you know you can use a strategy of just kind of see it as a real going by that just Fades as it goes
by so that you’re not getting too involved in it but don’t try to fight it or deny that it’s happening oh I didn’t
meditate well don’t judge it you know have compassion for yourself and it could be as simple if you’re just not
you know into all that woooo stuff as listening to One sound you know maybe you don’t have a headset and you don’t
have all that stuff with you but maybe there’s a hum of something like an air conditioner just let your mind focus on
one thing maybe there’s birds singing outside of your window and just focus on
that and let everything just be as it is and so you know that way it becomes a
flexible practice but the biggest thing that is going to to show you results is
a consistency of doing it picking the time of day morning or night everyone’s
different in that you know some people aren’t going to do it at night so when you wake up and when you go to sleep
you’re the closest to a dream Theta State you know to the state you were when you were you know up to age seven
and you want to be you know in the best state that you can now some people can find that time twice a day H the power
of that right I sometimes will’ll take a break in the midday if I need to really shift gears I want to go into creative
work and I can take five minutes and then I can be in a different state it’s all about learning that you can control
your State you don’t have to be a just a reactionary person out there in the
world because we’ve got enough of those right and so it’s really about taking back your power too um to create the
life that you want by starting in small steps like that and if you’re a person
that’s feeling triggered I say you know what acknowledge it and and be you know
what the roomy has a quote and this is one I love to kind of wrap up with the
hole is where the light comes in there is a reason you went through that thing
there is a reason why you’re feeling so much resistance when you hear certain you know thing come on the news or
whatever there is a reason for it and look at it as a point of you know what
the universe or whatever you believe in is trying to show you something that you
want to be able to look at differently you want to be able to shift your
perspective on it and take it as a point of this doesn’t have to mean oh I’m so
messed up and you know all that judgment stuff it can be this is a place where I
can invite myself to allow self-compassion and allow myself the
space to be a stronger person you know to to move forward with what I want in
life and not feel stuck so beautiful yeah um my fiance says like
the the you know the life will show present us with things that we need to address and we need to work on this this
mirroring technique people have different Notions of what these mirror teachings are and I think that’s one of
one of the ones so Denise it’s been um a a pleasure and an honor here and and and
a joy along the way to to to hear about um all the things that are possible with
this technique and the other things you bring um to your clients in your work and the the work you’ve done as well so
is there anything you’d like to to leave folks with do you have events coming up
offers how people can get in touch with you where they can find you online and
uh and then if there’s any other final message you’d like to to leave the audience
with sure thank you um so right now I have started a small group coaching
program where um we will work through all of the processes of subconscious
healing so you’ll learn it you’ll go through all of those stages of emotions
beliefs all of that and it’s really geared towards helping people with those
longstanding patterns so I have a short free uh training on it it’s about 18
minutes and if you go to rock your blocks.com you’ll see um a message on
there that you can just click enter your email and your name and you’ll get sent
the the video where you can learn more about that coaching experience and then also just going to my contact page on
the website I have my campsite bio on there so it has links to articles about
these topics um some of the videos from my YouTube channel and I like to be able
to as a as an educator provide different ways you know because sometimes people want to read about it they want to try
the meditations and they’re not quite ready to do coaching so I like having those options on there so definitely
check that all out and if you’d like to you can subscribe and I put out messages
you know about once a week about anything new that I’ve created and then pretty soon I’ll be releasing a short
book um self-published on just what this method is that involves the subconscious
and helps you to you know really learn some tools that you can really dig into
and make part of your regular practices so um hopefully you know you’ll be
seeing that if you if you join my mailing list that’ll be coming out soon but um yeah and just final thoughts
about it I guess you know the power of being in
alignment with what’s possible in your life with what you’ve always wanted is
something to me that is is you know that you are meant to be doing something when
you are you feel happy your emotions are your guide and when your soul feels true
Joy that’s what you need to move toward you know and maybe it’s just that you work too
hard so what can you do right now to bring more joy into your life and let
that be your guide let your emotions guide you to what it is that wants to be
more present in your life because any of those triggers any resist resistance you’re feeling it’s telling you that
maybe you’re pushing too hard right pushing too hard doesn’t necessarily get you to where you want to go but taking
care of you and feeling better and feeling happier with your days and what
you’re doing with your time are really the key to being aligned with who you
really are so thank you so much Josh it was great
to have this chat with you you’re welcome it was um my the feelings
are likewise here so may all beings everywhere experience true joy in their
heart of hearts bye everyone
beautiful
Integrating Presence 